A river in Egypt

I've got this passive aggressive thing working for me, but that leaves me emotionaly adrift. I'm frayed around the edges and the threat of coming apart seems all the more real.
Some things are moving so slowly I fear they will stagnate for good. Others move by in a mind numbing blur.
I reach out, and sometimes there's nothing to hold on to.
Then I come to my senses, have a 'this is your life, so deal with it' moment and I'm back on track. Because I have to be.
I need to make some changes, but I'm not sure to begin.